Disclaimer: I didn’t watch the halftime show. Reasons why will follow, so keep reading if you want to.
I have read posts on Facebook about the latest halftime show from the Superbowl. There seem to be 2 camps: one loved it, the other hated it.
It has been my practice, since the infamous wardrobe malfunction, to avoid the halftime show regardless of performers. When the news of who was performing the halftime show became public I knew that this particular show was not going to be something that I, nor my sons, were going to watch for sure. The advertisements leading up to the halftime show told me that I was correct. From what I have read and a few snapshots I have seen, I am so thankful that I asked the host of the party we were at to change the channel.
Some will say: Aren’t you being old-fashioned? What is wrong with women being sexy on national television? What is wrong with women wearing skimpy outfits? Isn’t it just a celebration of beauty that God created?
No, a lot, a lot, and not a chance.
The main reason why I didn’t watch nor want my sons to watch nor anyone else for that matter is because I don’t want to support a perversion of what God has created as beautiful. There is nothing wrong with thinking that a woman is beautiful and being attracted to her. I think my wife is beautiful, although I don’t tell her that as much as I should.
But what our culture has done, which is exemplified in the halftime show, is separate our bodies from the rest of us. Our culture says sex is all about the physical encounter and my pleasure. And if I can’t get it for real, I will just watch it being done and get pleasure out of that.
But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
Matthew 5:28 NIV
https://matthew.bible/matthew-5-28
I don’t know how a man could watch that without some lust.
Our culture says sex is just sex and nothing else. That might be true if we could actually separate our bodies from our minds and souls, but we can’t.
Sex is much more than physical pleasure. It is a bonding of 2 beings that God intended to be spiritual, emotional, and physical for the rest of our lives because we are more than just bodies.
“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’ ? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
Matthew 19:4-6 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/mat.19.4-6.NIV
The bonding of 2 people, a male and female, unites them into 1. No this does not literally mean they become one piece of flesh like conjoined twins but a bonding together of 2 beings because we cannot separate our bodies from everything else. There is something spiritual and emotional that happens during sex that is far deeper and greater than the physical gratification.
We are created to connect and bond with God and people. That is one of the things that separates us from animals. Every sexual encounter, whether physical or in our imagination through a screen, creates a bond with that other person and we leave a part of us with them and they leave a part of them with us.
Think of this illustration: If you place a piece of duct tape on a surface and it bonds with that surface, what happens when you take it off? Part of the duct tape remains on the surface and part of the surface remains on the duct tape. Do that over and over again and the bond created gets weaker and weaker until the duct tape loses its ability to bond to anything. That is what happens when we continually bond ourselves to people or objects(because that is what women have become) through sexual encounters. We lose our ability to bond with anyone, much less our spouse or future spouse.
This separation of body from mind and soul causes us to see women as an object to use for what we want and then when she has been used up, we will get another one, probably a younger model, or find a new one on the internet everyday.
As an object, and not a person, we can do with a woman what we want. Wonder why we have a marriage problem? Wonder why we have a porn problem? Wonder why we have so many absent fathers? Wonder why we have a sex trafficking problem? Wonder why we have a rape problem? It’s because women have been reduced to objects. In a culture that says it wants to free women to be women, we are enslaving women to this sexual ideal. Women are being exploited as sexual objects to be conquered and used. Women are being told that they must look and move a certain way in order to catch the attention of a male. Young girls are copying what they see and dressing “sexy” as elementary students. Wonder why child porn is a problem? Trafficking is a problem? Suicide is a problem? Sexual assault in the NFL and other sports is a problem?
We all are called to avoid sexual immorality.
But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.
Ephesians 5:3 NIV
https://ephesians.bible/ephesians-5-3
From what I can tell, there was much more than a HINT of sexual immorality. (Stripper pole? Hardly any wardrobe to malfunction? Sexual movements?)
You say: It’s no big deal. It was just great dancing. It’s part of the Latina culture. It’s not like they were naked.
Just because you say it is “part” of the Latina culture does not make it right nor is it fair to lump all Hispanic people into that “culture.” (I know Hispanic people personally who do not adhere to that philosophy.) That would be like saying that wearing white sheets over your head and burning crosses is a “part” of white culture. We know that is not right nor is it fair to lump all white people into that “culture.” (I don’t know anyone personally who adheres to that philosophy.)
Sexuality contrary to God’s plan has been part of culture for millennia, but that doesn’t make it acceptable. Just look at the book of Leviticus and see if perverse sexuality is something new. What is new in this realm is the availability and easy access to anyone, anywhere via the internet.
It begins with these sorts of “innocent” exposure, but our God-given, Satan-corrupted desire is not satisfied with that for long, especially the impressionable minds of our boys and girls and young men and women. So we go searching for more and more. I know from my experience that this is true as well as for many other men with whom I have talked.
Sexual arousal causes dopamine to be released in the brain that gives a sense of pleasure and then reminds us where that source of pleasure came from, so that we can go back to the source. So when we start craving for that pleasure, our brain reminds us of what and where we can satisfy that craving. Dopamine causes our brain to capture those images that brought the arousal and periodically sends those images to the forefront of our minds, years and decades later, like a hard drive that cannot be erased. So images we see as children or teenagers come back without us being able to control it.
For married people, it makes us think our wife doesn’t look or act or dress like that and so we begin to desire someone else and are no longer satisfied with the wife of our youth.
May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
Proverbs 5:18 NIV
https://proverbs.bible/proverbs-5-18
Some say they watch porn as a couple or my wife doesn’t care. This too is destructive and defeats the purpose of sex. As stated before, sex is supposed to bond a married couple spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Watching others brings another being, although not physically, into this union and bond. Therefore, it is not healthy because the focus is not on creating this bond with your spouse, but seeking selfish pleasure.
But God does not leave us without hope. Through Christ, we CAN overcome. The apostle Paul tells us,
We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
2 Corinthians 10:5 NIV
https://2corinthians.bible/2-corinthians-10-5
This corruption of a God-given desire can be dealt with as we take EVERY thought captive and make it obedient to Christ. When a sexual image or thought comes to my mind that is not pleasing to God, I must make the decision to capture it and focus on Christ. Sometimes looking at a physical cross helps. Sometimes quoting a scripture helps. Sometimes praying aloud a quick prayer helps. Sometimes saying, “For God so loved me (Chad) that he gave his one and only Son for this time right now” helps. Sometimes all of the above. But we have to immediately and consciously make the thought obedient to Christ before it takes root and continues down a path that we don’t really want to go.
Husbands are called to love our wives, which would include a future wife for those not yet married.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Ephesians 5:25-33 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/eph.5.25-33.NIV
The apostle Paul describes love that we are to have for each other in 1 Corinthians 13. Among other things, he says love is not self-seeking. Sexuality that exploits one person is self-seeking.
So, knowing what the halftime show was probably going to be like:
I chose to honor God with my body, including my eyes and mind.
Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.
1 Corinthians 6:18-20 NIV
https://bible.com/bible/111/1co.6.18-20.NIV
I chose to honor my wife and the other females of the world.
Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.
Romans 12:10 NIV
https://romans.bible/romans-12-10
I chose to avoid the temptation for my own good and for the good of my sons.
“I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman.
Job 31:1 NIV
https://job.bible/job-31-1
I continually choose to guard my heart and to protect my sons as best I can from this corruption because everything else depends on it.
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.
Proverbs 4:23 NIV
https://proverbs.bible/proverbs-4-23
Men, please, join me in honoring women for the wonderful creation that God created them to be.
Men, it will only change when we refuse consume this corruption of all kinds.
Renewing Our Relationships 